Moms in the Movies: The Good, the Bad, and the Hilarious

Writing in, Lisa Kogan compiled a list of “Best Mother” awards in forty quirky categories. Some of the write-ups are poignant but most are funny. And the Oscar goes to . . .

Best. Mother. Ever.

1. Best Mother Ever to Try Hypnotizing Her Son Into Assassinating the Future Leader of the Free World
--Angela Landsbury, The Manchurian Candidate

2. Best Daughter Ever to Turn Into Her Own Mother Thanks to a Most Unfortunate Fortune Cookie Accident
--Lindsay Lohan, Freaky Friday


3. Best Son Ever to Turn Into His Own Mother Thanks to a Most Unfortunate Break With Reality
--Anthony Perkins, Psycho

4. Best Cool Mom Who Couldn't Possibly Be Less Cool
--Amy Poehler, Mean Girls

5. Best Not Cool Mom Who Actually Turns Out to Be Totally Cool
--Frances McDormand, Almost Famous

6. Best Mommie Ever to Show a Strong Predilection for Wood Hangers
--Faye Dunaway, Mommie Dearest

7. Best Mother Ever to Blow Her Life On the World's Most Bratty Daughter
--Joan Crawford, Mildred Pierce

8. Best Mother Ever to Make His Son Cringe Each Time She Opens Her Mouth
--Debbie Reynolds, Mother

9. Best Stage Mother Ever to Bulldoze Her Daughter Into Burlesque
--Rosalind Russell, Gypsy

10. Best Mother Ever to Bake a Ham for Woody Allen
--Colleen Dewhurst, Annie Hall

11. Best Mother Ever to Turn Cougar On the Guy Who Would Become Her Daughter's Boyfriend
--Anne Bancroft, The Graduate

12. Best Mother Ever to Make Ends Meet
--Dianne Carroll, Claudine

13. Best Mama Ever to Not Be Thrown from a Train
--Anne Ramsey, Throw Mama from the Train

14. Best Mother Ever to Have Her Skirt Inadvertently Twirl Up (sans Panties) at Her Daughter's Birthday Party
--Shirley MacLaine, Postcards from the Edge

15. Best Mother Ever to Beat Someone to Death With a Leg of Lamb
--Kathleen Turner, Serial Mom

16. Best Mother Ever to Have the Door Closed in Her Face During a Sneak Visit With Michael Corleone's Children
--Diane Keaton, The Godfather

17. Best Mother Ever to Go the Ultra-Conservative Route Over Dinner With Her Son's Fiancée and Her Right-Wing Folks
--Nathan Lane, The Birdcage

18. Best Mother Ever to Send Her Daughter to the Lousiest Prom in History
--Piper Laurie, Carrie

19. Best Mother to Finally Grasp That "An Accident Can Be an Unhappy Woman's Best Friend"
--Kathy Bates, Dolores Claiborne

20. Best Mother Ever to Have Her Baby Eaten by a Dingo
--Meryl Streep, A Cry in the Dark

21. Best Mother Ever to Force Her Assistant to Track Down an Advance Copy of the Latest Harry Potter sequel for Her Kids
--Meryl Streep, The Devil Wears Prada

22. Best Mother Ever to Have an Affair With the Father of Her Children
--Meryl Streep, It's Complicated

23. Best Mother Ever to Attempt to Keep Her Daughter from Panicking While Hiding in a Very Chic Brownstone
--Jodi Foster, The Panic Room

24. Best Mother Ever to Find Meaning in a Box of Chocolates
--Sally Field, Forrest Gump

25. Best Mother Ever to Make Timothy Hutton Downright Suicidal
--Mary Tyler Moore, Ordinary People

26. Best Mother Ever to Raise a Really Terrific Son
--Verna Bloom, Last Temptation of Christ

27. Best Non-Mother Ever to Contract Amnesia and Four Kids After Falling from a Boat
--Goldie Hawn, Overboard


28. Best Mother Ever to Give Birth to Satan
--Mia Farrow, Rosemary's Baby

29. Best Mother Ever to Nurture an Up-and-Coming Hair Stylist
--Dianne Wiest, Edward Scissorhands

30. Best Mother/Brothel Owner Never to Nurture James Dean
--Jo Van Fleet, East of Eden

31. Best Mother Ever to Become a Touch Confused by Her "My Daughter, My Sister, My Daughter, My Sister" Family Tree
--Faye Dunaway, Chinatown

32. Best Mothers Ever to Root for Their Children's Happiness
--Beah Richards & Katherine Hepburn, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

33. Best Mother Ever to Go Out With a Bang and Traumatize an Entire Generation of Filmgoers
--Jane Doe, Bambi

34. Best Mother Ever to Cook an Italian Feast When Her Sociopathic Son and His Buddies Drop By to Borrow a Shovel
--Catherine Scorseese, Goodfellas

35. Best Mother Ever to Insist That Her Daughter Receive Pain Medication in a Timely Fashion
--Shirley Maclaine, Terms of Endearment

36. Best Stepmother Ever to Hire a Male Model to Pretend to Be Her Stepdaughter's Boyfriend in Front of Some Nasty Kids
--Julia Roberts, The Stepmother

37. Best Mother Ever to Leave Her Children in Very Good Hands
--Susan Sarandon, The Stepmother

38. Best Mother Ever to Hit the Road
--Barbara Streisand, The Guilt Trip

39. Best Mother Ever to Juggle Work (as a Sex Therapist) With Child Rearing
--Helen Hunt, The Sessions

40. Best Mother Ever to Make You Grateful for Your Own Mother
--Mo'Nique, Precious

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